The World Cup third-place game was absurd ― I loved it | Opinion
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MIAMI GARDENS, FL ― The World Cup third-place game was one of the most ridiculous matches of the tournament.
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And, I loved every second of it.
The first half was an absolute disaster class from France. Three minutes in, England's Declan Rice scored the first of the four first-half goals. Had France even gotten off the bus? Would Kylian Mbappé disappear again? Was France's scoreless outing against Spain on July 14 ― gulp ― not an exception?
Not to be dramatic, but less than 20 minutes in, the Three Lions had already scored two goals. Then, Bukayo Saka added another goal to make it 3-0 for England in the 37th minute. France's goalie was out of position, and after multiple tries to get around him and a nearby defender, Saka finally found the back of the net. The English forward's good fortune continued when he found pay dirt at the 46th minute with another goal.
Saka's strike put England up 4-0 at halftime. That is not a typo.
"This game was very important for us to win, "Saka said post-game. "This was a game that, honestly, many players wouldn't have wanted to play but moreso, me, I was happy to play, get some more minutes, and enjoy the last game of the World Cup. It only comes every four years."
In the second half, the game completely flipped on its head. There was an onslaught of goals and records. Strike that. It was an all-out avalanche of historic proportions, and nothing made sense. Suddenly, France decided it wanted to play, and didn't tell a single soul in the building until it started churning out goals like a World Cup All-Star game.
In just 18 minutes, Les Bleus scored three goals to cut into the deficit, bringing the score to 4-3 behind an Mbappé brace that broke Lionel Messi's career World Cup goals record (21) and bumped the France forward's tournament total to 10. Mbappé became the first player to score more than eight goals in a single World Cup since West Germany’s Gerd Müller did so in 1970, also with 10 goals.
"Messi is going to score (on Sunday), that's for sure. I'm just trying to help my team win. When you score a lot of goals at the World Cup, it puts you in a certain category," said Mbappé. "I would have preferred not to be the all-time top scorer and to be playing tomorrow's match. It's good in terms of legacy, but today it's not the first thing on my mind."
France, after waking from its slumber, added more history to the third-place match. Michael Olise, who assisted Mbappé on both goals, broke the record for most assists in a World Cup (7). Olise surpassed Brazil legend Pelé, who had six assists in the 1970 World Cup, where the Seleção won the tournament by beating Italy 4-1 in the final.
MBAPPÉ BECOMES THE ALL-TIME FIFA WORLD CUP LEADER IN GOALS SCORED 🇫🇷
— FOX Sports (@FOXSports) July 18, 2026
HE SCORES HIS 22ND GOAL TO TAKE THE LEAD OVER MESSI 🤯 pic.twitter.com/MV8YP7VM95
As France trimmed the lead down, I began to think about how losing 4-3 would be a lot less shameful than the 4-0 drubbing in the first half, or whatever effort it had trotted out onto the pitch. My mind began to think that this is a much more respectable way to lose if this is going to be France's last hurrah for the next four years. Clearly, France heard my musings and decided England needed a penalty kick to keep the madness going. Sure. Why not?
It had to be Saka to take the kick, so he could be the player ― not Mbappé, as many assumed with Harry Kane and Jude Bellingham not starting ― to get the game's hat trick. With ice in his veins, the English forward casually nailed his penalty, completing the hat-trick, extending the score to 5-3. Saka's score solicited a smile and hug from Bellingham, who checked in at the 79th minute. The moment even made Mbappé and Djed Spence smile, who embraced as the ball went in ― scenes you don't usually see mid-World Cup match with money and more on the line.
"To see a team fight like this gives you energy. The tiredness will come after. We will still feel the pain when we know tomorrow is the final ... this will take a while. But overall, this gives me more energy than it takes from me," England manager Thomas Tuchel said.
Following Saka's hat trick at the 87th minute, I felt comfortable that 5-3 was more than enough as a final result. That's a high-scoring affair. Everyone goes home happy. But the World Cup third-place game was slowly sliding off the rails into silliness before I could even digest all that happened at Hard Rock Stadium on Saturday.
France's Ousmane Dembele and Bellingham scored goals unexplicably in the 96th and 98th minutes, respectively. Why have eight goals between the two teams when you can have 10?
The final strike in Saturday's 6-4 England win (Bellingham's exclamation point goal) drew laughter in the press box, and I couldn't help but chuckle. What I witnessed in Miami was nonsensical in every way. The game wasn't supposed to end like that. No game really should.
Still, perhaps there is no better way I'd rather end my own 10-game tournament World Cup journey than by witnessing the highest-scoring World Cup game in 44 years and the most goals ever scored in a World Cup third-place game. Long live the third-place final. May it be a treasure to all who viewed it.
"It was (a) crazy, crazy game," Saka said.
"Obviously, we're both quite disappointed to not be in the final, but it was about finishing strong. And for us, giving the country the best position in the World Cup they finished for around 60 years. So, we're happy with the final result."
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: The World Cup third-place game was absurd ― I loved it | Opinion